a term often attributed to wrong and through

“Narcissistic perversion is a personality pathology, first identified and named in its modern form by the psychoanalyst Paul-Claude Racamier in 1986”, recalls Anne Clotilde Ziegler, psychotherapist, in her book “Narcissistic perverts, lower your masks”.

In the same psychoanalytic definition given by Racamier, the narcissistic pervert is a subject who puts in “a lasting or transitory organization characterized by the need, the ability and the pleasure of sheltering oneself from internal conflicts and in particular from mourning, affirming itself at the expense of an object manipulated as a tool and a value”.

More concretely, it is a predator who chooses a target (“his” victim, because he does not behave like this with everyone), isolates him from others to better establish his grip and enjoys diminishing it and making us suffer, until it destroys it. .

It can be a lover, but also a friend, a superior at work or even a member of his family …

“The relationship of influence is often the first sign that allows us to recognize the presence of the narcissistic pervert”, Anne Clotilde Ziegler further specifies. And, surprisingly, it is the suffering of his prey that reveals it: the victim – who has nothing to do with it! – he gradually loses all self-esteem and often has to undertake a long psychological work of reconstruction.

As for the narcissistic pervert, he never goes to therapy: everything is fine for him! Furthermore, he is not even aware of the harm he can do or believes he is right.

Beware of language abuse!

Since its “discovery”, the expression “narcissistic pervert” has been very popular: many people know of a narcissistic pervert or someone who has dealt with such a character.

The term has just entered the Petit Larousse (edition 2023) … But beware, because the diagnosis of a narcissistic pervert is often wrongly and entirely attributed. “In ordinary usage, ‘narcissistic pervert’ = ‘personality to escape’ (or ‘fight’ by appropriate means if it is not possible to escape)” sums up Marc Joly, a CNRS sociologist specializing in the study of the social process that popularized the notion of “pervert narcissist”, in an article published on The Conversation website.

“It is essential not to see manipulators everywhere. The risk is threefold: becoming excessively suspicious, in a somewhat paranoid logic; not bothering to settle conflicts in a relationship where possible; water down the idea to make it a vague designation of the people with whom it is not possible to agree … “, concludes Anne Clotilde Ziegler. It is best, when suffering in a relationship, to seek help from a professional!

Source: Anne Clotilde Ziegler “Narcissistic Perverts, Put Your Masks Down”, Ed. Solare, 288 pages (2015).

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